Sunday, June 7, 2015

Make me (less) wet.

    A new bike can bring only one of two situations to the fore: plentiful hero dirt on the trails; or a complete near-repeat of the Great Flood of 1993, wherein every trail within 100 miles is as sloppy as an orgy at the KY factory. That being said, since my Pivot Les Fat 29+ was completed nearly a month ago, I have had the tumultuous luxury of riding said steed enough to realize her potential, and wake up covered in drool from a daydream wherein I am able to ride a full 3 hours or so on dry single-track, wherever that may be. As I type these very words, yet another set of storms is approaching from the West, alleviating any drying effect the 90 degree sun/wind combination of today had on terra firma. This is literally the first time since moving back to Kansas City from Portland in 1998 that I have logged more miles on the road in a month than in the forests...granted these 'roadie' hours are to the pub/party and back, but pedaling is pedaling, even though my upper-body is a flab-fest of mooberific proportions. hometown of Emporia Kansas saw its share of flooding last week as well. The Cottonwood river went out of its banks and into the Flint Hills, nearly derailing the 10th Dirty Kanza. 

The latest installment of our
8Lumens sticker collection will be available soon on our Big Cartel site...

Butt now, let us convene the panel discussion on the simple fact that our roots as Puritans in this Cuntry are still a formidable foe in our year of the Lard, 2015:

I'm not sure which of my 'friends' on FaceFuck reported the above picture, taken so artfully by Mr. Fisky, but I can say with a veracity close to 100% that it might be the greatest helping of ThanksTaking Day hilarity I have yet to witness. Yes, I have been 36-48 hour banned from the Book of Faces 3 times now, but this photo takes the cake, the cookies, the donuts and the Twinkies and makes a concomitant sample that borders on perfection. Oh Hell, in the end -and there is a predictable end - I will get my own reality TV show that popularizes the notion that over-educated men with a 4th-grade mentality always win in the end, even if they were not part of a 36 member family tree that has only 2 branches.

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