Sunday, June 29, 2014

Beers Steers and *&@#&!^#s….and beers.

Glory be to the Heyzeus on High: progress is a slow turd, caught in the bowels of elation; offending only those without a sense of tumor.

It has been a busty week here in the land of the Lumens, what with Saxy Golden Swope insanity, multiple visits to the Bier Station and a plentitude of Eggo Waffles that would shame a 3rd world country into a War of Civility. Yes yes y'all, cycling here in the Kansass Shitty is alive and kicking arse, though I missed the monthly Critical Mass on Friday - which was attending by hundreds. I tend to avoid riding in groups on the streets unless I am stumbling drunk and belligerent to the point of rear-view mirror removal force. Butt, therein lies the greater issue of intent: Can one listen to the latest Mastodon Cd without the desire to bash a few car doors with a SPD?

In more coherent words, let us discuss the one year anniversary of the raddddddiest bike shop in all of the county of Johnsons: Velo+ in Lenexa KS. Coffee, beer, bikes and Taddihogg Cycling Hats for fuckety's sake. 

Well…I'm too intoxicated; too over-self-served; too AA Gawd-Fucked to make a worthy analysis of how amazing Vincent and The Dye have been over the last year in promoting all things of the groove. That's really all that needs to be said…more power to y'all train track-adjacent folks: Kick Kansas' ass all the way back to ToPuka and drive the Brownbutt of Sam into the asylum. 

And, although the Bier Station is across the border, as is Mother's Brewery in Springfield, the tap takeover/8Lumens corporal meeting was a complete success, including a rare hot-Yoga session in the parking lot wherein I did damage/insemination thrusts in front of millions of my fan-boys…
That is all: at least until the 8Lumens "Fuck Yeah" socks arrive on Tuesday and we proceed to take over the Durty Wurl one athlete's foot at a time.

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